


Decorative Vases and Kissable Faces

by jentaro



Series: LSCC [2]
Category: The Adventure Zone (Podcast)
Genre: F/F, it does take place before the events of LSCC though, it's just set in the same universe as it, related to LSCC but not necessary to read in conjunction
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-01-28
Updated: 2017-01-28
Packaged: 2018-09-20 12:29:18
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,468
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/9491006
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/jentaro/pseuds/jentaro
Summary: Even the biggest bouquet of Carey's favorite flowers would never be beautiful enough to overshadow this ceramic blemish on fine art and home decor.





	

**Author's Note:**

> hey friends, I promise I'm working on LSCC as much as I can. the next chapter is almost half done, but there's a lot of big plot decisions I'm trying to make that are going to alter what direction I'm going to take that fic in, so it's taking longer to figure out how I'm going to accomplish that with the scenes I'm currently writing. in the meantime, I've had a Week at work and last night I had a Night, so I woke up this morning and immediately had to write my favorite TAZ ladies because i'm just so gay for killian and carey and i did not pay nearly enough attention to their wedding in LSCC since they're not the direct focus. this is a short lil thing but I hope yall enjoy it ٩(๑❛ᴗ❛๑)۶

“That's not the point! _I_ think it's amazing and I want it?” Said as if it were even a question, as if it were even a possibility that they were not going home with this gaudy, ridiculous piece of decor that Killian would roll her eyes at every single day for the rest of her life.

“It's….. it's so seriously hideous, I can't consciously say yes,” Killian said almost exasperated, even as Carey picked it up to inspect it further.

“Why not? It’s got _everything_ ,” she looked like a kid in a candy store. An adorable kid in at a run down flea market booth who had picked up the single most cursed artifact in the world and proceeded to think it was so goddamn cool that it was worth picking up and bringing over the threshold into their humble household.

“Over my dead body, babe,” earning her a glare over the rim of the vase before Carey went back to carefully inspecting it. “Please, I can’t look at that every day for the rest of my life. I… I can’t do it.”

“Why don’t you like it? It’s literally perfect in every conceivable way. I’m in love with it,” turning it over in her hands with the utmost of care, Carey checked the price tag taped on and smiled even harder, to Killian’s chagrin. “This is a _steal_ , I can’t leave it here,” then she looked up with _those_ eyes and whispered, “I can’t.”

Killian carefully, but with as little contact with it as possible, picked it up and put it back on the table, then took Carey’s face in hand, squishing her cheeks as she said, “I made a commitment to grow old with you, not with a rejected art project staring at me on my death bed, mocking me.” Carey whined quietly, the sound of her disappointment tugging fiercely at Killian’s heartstrings, but she didn’t want to budge on this. Everything about the vase was grotesque. Horrible. Abominable. Appalling. Stomach churning. If Killian had a thesaurus on hand, she might also have found words to describe it such as: repulsive, revolting, shocking, dreadful, atrocious. “It’s a tragic look into the heart of a person who is being haunted by horrible demons. It came from hell itself.”

Still, Carey persisted with the sad eyes, making Killian’s poor heart twist in her chest once more. Then her eyes averted, and she looked dejected, like Killian had done some horrendous, violent act.

“Okay,” sounding muffled through her squished cheeks, crestfallen as she stepped back and turned away from Killian, making to walk away from this horrid booth at the flea market. A booth that had many, _many_ other tacky items available that Killian would rather drop her money on in the hopes of appeasing her fiance. Of course she had her heart set on… this. This horrid vase that had come straight from her classic rock nightmares.

The gaudy thing, an off-white cowboy boot shape. A high heeled cowboy boot. The bold red lettering of AC⚡DC insulting her to her very core. One badly painted fever dream hallucination rose on the toe of the boot, and one muted pepto bismol pink rose on the side underneath the offensive logo with a yellow bud sprouting from the leaves in another direction. Carey was possibly more in love with this than any other material possession she had ever had in her life, and Killian _hated_ it. She hated it to her very core, the mere sight of it was revolting.

Carey retreated to the next booth, looking over the costume jewelry. The way she carried herself had that hint of genuine sadness, and Killian knew right then and there that she had a decision to make. Either it was coming home with them, or Carey would be sad for quite possibly _weeks_ about this. She wouldn’t bring it up, of course, but Killian knew she would think about it wistfully for, well, probably forever.

In her heart, she knew the delusion vessel was coming home with them, but what she didn’t expect was her coworker Brad coming up to the booth and zoning in on the boot as if the gods themselves were testing her as his fingertips brushed the regurgitated ceramic rose on the toe. “Don’t you even think about it Bradson.”

Brad’s fingers hesitated, caught off guard by her clearly, but he turned and said, “Killian! I didn’t notice you there.”

“Bullshit,” Killian knew she stood out with how tall and fit she was, but she continued, “Hands off the boot, that’s mine.”

“Huh? I seem to recall overhearing you tell a certain someone no,” he said with a hint of a smug smile that she almost wanted to wipe off his face. It was even worse because he was _right_ , and Killian had a mistake to fix.

“And I seem to recall a time you used Lucretia’s desk for–”

Panicked, Brad cut her off with, “OKAY, wow, you’re really gonna call that in over this vase?”

Something very lewd that Killian had walked in on. Nodding, she solemnly said, “I am. I was saving it for something better, but no matter how much I want to smash this and throw the pieces in a volcano, if I don’t buy it _right now_ , I won’t be able to live with myself.”

“Now _that_ is true love, Killian. Fine, fine, I concede. It’s great, but not great enough to invoke your wrath,” Brad said putting his hands up in surrender.

“Damn right, now move along,” Killian said as she dug into her back pocket for her wallet. She shuddered as she looked at the price. Fuck. Five dollars _was_ a steal for eternal damnation at the heel of Satan themselves’ boot. She was on a literal highway to hell. A footpath to hell? A flea market that was surely stationed in hell itself.

The attendant had a glazed over look in her eyes as Killian handed her the soggiest five dollar bill she had in her possession, her own quiet revenge for this disaster piece. She took it as is, no four year old Sunday paper sports section wrapping. Carey had barely made it to the booth at the end of the first row of the small flea market. In its entirety, the little dirt parking lot it was set up in had two rows that were small in stature. With a town of so few people, it was a mystery how the people who set up shop every other Sunday had new items filter in. The selection was always varied, but Killian was strongly debating never suggesting they come here again in the event she had to choose between a happy Carey and a gloomy one.

When Killian caught up, she tried to decide what approach she was going to take, but before she could get a chance, Carey looked up from the collection of broaches this person had set out and caught her out of the corner of her eye. Her, and the boot cradled in her arms. It took a second for the realization to set in, but when the smile returned on Carey’s face, Killian felt her heart speed up.

“Killian…” That was the look she _lived_ for. The smile that seemed to brighten up even this sort of dreary, overcast day. Directed at her, even. God help her, her heart was about to jump out of her chest. “You didn’t have to buy it! I know you hate it…”

“But you love it, and I love you,” sappy words that made Carey blush, actually having to put a hand to her face and avert her eyes for a second. Making her giggle quietly. Killian knew it would mean Carey would be devastated if she dropped the vase and it broke, but in that instant, she couldn’t feel anything but how she was so in love her arms were numb and her legs felt like jello while her stomach flipped.

“You’re such a dork sometimes, ugh,” but Killian was helpless without a reply while she watched Carey stand on her toes, reaching up to take her face in her hands so she could kiss her. Soft lips against her own that made it more okay that they’d be growing old together with this vase staring at her from the mantle as she lay on her deathbed surrounded by her loved ones.

As they parted, Killian mumbled, “I guess hell ain’t a bad place to be–”

Carey cackled, smacking her on the arm lightly as she took the vase from her to hold onto. A dear treasure. The apple of her eye. Killian’s curse. One that she would willingly bear, and god help her if the ugly porcelain pox on the art community ever broke.

**Author's Note:**

> i did a google search for "hideous vase" and [this](https://68.media.tumblr.com/46c092af28475fb40186ebd48e8ca149/tumblr_inline_oki1jlYuUD1qbw22z_540.png) was the second result. i love this vase with my heart and soul and tbh tag yourself i'm Carey and I want a buff wife to wrestle with the consequences of buying it for me to be happy. anyway thanks for reading, and I promise I'll try to update LSCC soon ♥


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